Le Coup des Carrotes (Carrots Part Two)

If you missed my carrot tale…the one where my neighbour in basically said I was rubbish at gardening…then check it out here.

Fast forward, ooh, almost four months. Basically the months that time forgot. My carrots were slowly growing. Growing from seeds into a big, mahoosive, ok adequate sized but fully fledged and hopefully edible carrots.

This was important to me. Slightly childish, yes, but important none the less. When I stuck to my guns and didn’t give up my last bastion of relaxation away from work (especially important when nothing else in Edinburgh has been happening) who knew that success would come. A kind of coup, if you, will from the tyranny of the ‘controlling communal garden’ neighbour.

To be fair his veg have also done ok. But…he stuck to onions. I have onions too! Still a little small owing to the colder climate, but I have them and they look bloody better than his!

I am surprised, as will everyone I know, that my veg worked out. For me the outcome is not always the point of it. I enjoy having a couple of raised beds. I oddly get excited about things growing into food. And whilst I am not bloody Monty Dom even his carrots don’t always work. He just plants about four different types so that one of them will. Well Monty (and the garden warden, aka ‘that’ neighbour) how about my carrots.

I’ll leave you with a photo (actually my carrots in my photo!!!). And a couple of wise words to the neighbour.

FUCK YOU 😁

P.s. gardening is actually rather relaxing. Im going to make soup with these carrots and whilst I am amused at how well they have done (to annoy my neighbour), I am more happy about them just actually growing.

Toes out

It’s a gorgeous day in Edinburgh.

Sun is out. Veg is all planted. Day off!!

Flip flops are the only things I’m going to put on my feet today. I’ve done a yoga class. Side crow as a peak pose in my living room was pretty satisfying. Best thing is that I’m sure my instructor couldn’t see how rubbish it was 😊.

What is everyone up to today?

Me – I’m in the garden. My toes are getting some sun. My 🎧 are on and I am loving today. If you have any great music to recommend send it my way. I’m not moving from here unless it is to dance around the garden with a wine 🍾.

Tomorrow – it never comes so I’ll just be focusing on today, toes, tanning and temptation…(it was the only other t I could thing of!).

Carrots

Yes Carrots. No that is not me swearing about something. Although ‘carrots’ might be a new swear word (curse word) in my life going forward. Hilariously funny, wonderfully petulant, satisfyingly perturbed – carrots now feature in my life as as one of those little stories that is worth hanging onto. Who would have known!

My vegetables didn’t do well at all last year. I did get some spinach and rocket and it was lovely. Most other things…meh. Probably due to me not being Monty Dom. Probably a little due to a weird late spring. Was I bothered? Not at all! It can be more expensive to grow veg, the shops had food in them and I didn’t go without. Was my neighbour, someone I thought was a fellow excited veg grower, bothered? It seems so.

Me when my veg actually grows

Him saying ‘well done’,…,not

I got a text from him. It was nice enough. He wanted to use my raised beds if I wasn’t going to. Of course I am going to. I like gardening. I should caveat that by saying I like some gardening. I am not a gardener but I like growing things. It is quite satisfying and fills me with joy when I skip out into the garden and cut some spinach off for my curry. Or some rocket for my salad. I skip back in and eat it in a more satisfied, I grew that way, than when I have bought a packet of spinach that lasts only one day.

So I politely declined his lovely offer of utilising my raised beds. This was clearly not the correct answer. What happened next is so shocking and so funny that I don’t quite know how to write it on paper. You may be shocked. You may be upset. You may laugh at me. You may laugh at him. Either or, or any of these, ways – here goes.

I got a lecture on using my raised beds to their full. They apparently shouldn’t be wasted in the current climate. Fine…but not really fine. Its two raised beds…not exactly contributing to a war effort here. Tesco’s is not far away. They have food. I can, however, take that one on the chin; roll with the punches. But I got KO’d for my carrots. Apparently I wasted the whole lot last year.

I did chuck them out. But here is the thing. Are carrots actually carrots if they haven’t grown into carrots? My carrots resembled little stumps rather than carrots. Here is another thing. If they are unceremoniously tossed on the compost heap are they wasted? My neighbour and myself seem to disagree on the definition of wasted. Oh well (I wrote that in a very sarcastic sounding voice).

The texts descended into an argument, the argument descended into what might be described as some akin to a feud. Over CARROTS! Yes, you are welcome! Mull it over for a while…come to your own conclusion on this one. All assessments of the situation are valid.

Unfortunately my work colleagues won’t ever let this one go. Having been witness to the whole thing by text and phone they have now taken on the view that I am a SHIT gardener and my CARROTS are rubbish. This has led to lots of laughing at work. Because it is true :-).

I had all my vegetable seeds ready for this year. Before the garden argument happened. I didn’t have carrots in that mix.

I do now.

Those carrots are getting planted today.

Growing my own vegetables: not the best year

I decided this year I wanted some pumpkins. Not really for eating…I am not a fan of pumpkin…well any pumpkin related food. I wouldn’t waste them; the neighbours cook odd stuff so I am sure they would have took them off my hands.

My reason for the pumpkins was so that we would have plenty for the annual Halloween party. Who doesn’t like a bit of fancy dress with carved pumpkins around and lots of 🍷!

This year, along with the pumpkins, I wanted some leaves and tomatoes. Maybe it’s been a funny gardening year or maybe I am just rubbish at this but the majority of things (with the exception of some lovely rocket) never turned out well at all.

It’s not like this was my first growing veg year. I have been doing some vegetables in a few raised beds for the last couple of years I have slowly figured out how much I actually need. Usually salad type leaves (rocket and spinach), some coriander, some spring onions and occasionally I have done potatoes and garlic. Sometimes it works. Sometimes they look like the image for this post. This year my veg looked nothing like it!

The pumpkin plant is like a bloody triffid. It sprawled in every direction and produced lovely big flowers with the promise of loads of pumpkins. Every single mini pumpkin beginning (or whatever you call them) has turned to mush. I don’t even know if they have been eaten or are just not making the grade of turning into adult like pumpkins.

The tomatoes (all five plants of them) have only produced two good and lovely red looking tomatoes. You guessed it…baby tomatoes. Why did this happen. They grew, they flowered, little tomatoes formed – but they never really ripened. Maybe it’s a Scottish thing, maybe it is just that kind of year or quite possibly maybe it is my rubbish gardening skills.

It all started off so well. Things did grow. Things didn’t grow up. At least I had some good rocket. At least I don’t put tomatoes in everything (my mum does this with meals…don’t even ask). At least there is a local Tesco to buy pumpkins for Halloween. Next year will surely be better! Or maybe I will grow some pretty flowers instead.

The ‘triffid’

(aka pumpkin failure)

Main Photo by Ella Olsson on Unsplash (obviously not my produce)

Summer Garden

I share a communal garden in the midst of Edinburgh. It feels like the countryside though. If you go out the front door of the old Edinburgh style tenement there is a busy road. Out the back backdoor, however, the garden is only overlooked by a hill full of greenery. The birds are singing, the fox cubs are playing (and generally trying to steal anything of interest), the squirrels are chasing each other and the traffic feels like a mile away; although sometimes we hear the blast of a train horn coming into Waverley.

Like a lot of Edinburgh flats the ceilings are high, the stairways cool and the gardens are shared. Ours is only used regularly by 4 flats; me included. We are a quirky bunch and all very different but we socialise, bbq, drink wine / beer, sing and play along on whatever instrument makes an appearance. The summer months will always find one or more of us sharing the space. Sometimes we chat, laugh and generally have fun; sometimes we grab our own little corner and read.

Our Garden

It’s a hotchpot of a garden. An old picnic table and bench, some chairs scattered round and a corner bench made of sleepers offer plenty of areas to sit in. We have a pond, thankfully some grass to lie on in the sun, trees, walls, and a mix of plants, flowers and veg patches. Rustic and unorganised would be an apt description.

We keep the garden maintained which takes a lot of work but no one is too fussy about having an overly structured space. This thankfully avoids arguments but on occasion we all fall out about something or other. It doesn’t last long; it would be awkward if it did as how else would we all get fed (the bbq is an essential cooking space for summer dinners…even some winter ones).

The flowers

Californian poppy

They are currently in full bloom with more to come. My absolute favourite is the Californian poppies (my neighbour planted them) but there are great flowers in every corner of the garden. I took some photos today of a range. I haven’t a clue what they are all called but I’m sure one of the neighbours will.

The wildlife

Apart from my neighbours and myself…we are really proud of all the wildlife in such an urban environment. The foxes all get names. Even the unusually coloured pigeon (a white one) has one. The squirrels don’t get names due to the fact they annoyingly dig up any tasty looking bulb we try and plant in spring. They occasionally have a stampede through my raised beds but I haven’t lost any vegetables yet. The cheeky fox cub does like to steal garden aids. Yesterday I saw him running out of his secret bolt hole (not too secret) with my foam garden mat. Cheeky little thing. I chased him and triumphantly got it back. He admitted defeat and sat next to me for a bit whilst I soaked up the last of the sun with a glass of wine.

The flowers, the wildlife and my vegetable patch are a little slice of serenity in the midst of the city. I have a few days off from work. I am praying for the sun to be out. But even if it isn’t, I will be out, in the garden, pottering and taking a break from the grind of a busy forty something life.